we're sick

as i lay here next to my two sleeping boys, there is so much i want to tell them. things that i hope they know already, but i wish i could wake them and tell them just to be sure. colter is curled up next to me with his leg on mine and his arm tucked between my arm and side. ezra over there in his LBJ jersey he had to have. he was so obviously feeling under the weather but doing his best to stay the happy boy he is.  and i am so blessed to be their mama. it's sad to realize how ordinary they seem to me all the time. but when i'm really looking- when im really paying attention i notice these little quirks about them that i never want to forget. the way colter walks around with his little high-step, the insanely soft skin on ezra and the surprisingly scaly skin on colter. the way colter stands and reaches his arms up to me and points me where he wants to go (which usually ends up being in a maddening circle). the sweet tone in ezra's voice and the way his face scrunches into a scowl when he doesn't get his way. the slobbery, open mouth kisses from colter (and when he's giving them out i get at least 20 in a row) and the closed, tight-lipped kisses from ez that are usually accompanied with a two-armed squeeze. and OH MY gosh can we talk about colter's wild hair and the way it puffs up in the back? i am not sure when i'll ever get the nerve to cut it. 

these boys are extraordinary. they make me a better person. they make me want to be better. and yes, sometimes they make me want to run my head into the wall but so far no broken sheetrock. i just feel blessed and i felt like sharing that with you, whoever you may be.